Higher than expected turnout...

Well last night went pretty well. We had good conversation, the show was good, and yes we fooled around. It was not quite without the passion of usual, and did deviate a bit from our standard formula, but it does, disappoint me that so often it feels like its something that is done because its expected. Spontaneous fun, erotic, kinky, passionate, any, some, one of those would be nice.

I feel like I am a burden that she is satisfying. Thats not what its supposed to be, its supposed to be a mutually gratifying piece of love. Something you both want and desire, something you both need.

Its just not supposed to be that way.